on that unhappy day, i was really pissed, frustrated.. but we were left with no choice wat.. but after thinking for a very very long time, i guess we were wrong afterall ba.. ah ma wld rather harmony in the family.. but i jus couldnt stand how gor gor was shot..
tats how wei da gor gor is.. forever.. since young, he was always sabotaged.. yeah by us, unintentionally.. but he will always do his best to protect us one.. and even take blames.. haiz
during the 2 days meiyan took off, work was so smooth, i finished wat i can spread out within november to do.. and guess wat? the 2 whole days i spent all the time toking to ah ma..
abt that dream, its looks real, i was even trembling *i blame myself for that and stop immediately..*, but it was really really short..
haiz..
these few days got really nothing to do.. meiyan asked if i can jus dun do anything and stare at nothing.. i say of cos.. cos its fun.. its my "hobby". ya.. but i rather find things to do... dun wan to think alot alot..
today, me and meiyan were toking.. she asked wat is our motive in life.. yeah.. wat is it? i also dunno..
gotta go search liao.. motive.. motive.. wats the meaning in life?
suddenly nothing interest me liao.. dun even noe wat i like. dun even noe wat i wan to do. dun even noe if i am interested in wat i had decided. dun even think i can do it. dun even think i will stay in one thing forever.
but something happier. i am no longer teaching!!!!! yeah for the sake of everyone.. the last two lessons, i guess i gave him more than 5 slaps each lesson.. cos the way he think, the way he does my paper, the way he complains, the way he keeps toking, the way he ding zhui, the very bu shuang face...
when i saw how he does my paper ah.. i felt like jus tearing it up ok.. "wah lao.. so many questions.." "why so difficult one.." "i dunno how to do la.." purposely write so messy, make the paper so crumpled.. u know, i rather destroy my own work than let others zhao ta it..
i am still bringing him to the underwater world.. sian.. have to go out somemore.. i where got so much time.. take off meh.. siao.. i still going to bring his brother along..... wah lao.. i tot his brother wld be ok.. so i told the mother liao.. then i remembered that time that chalet.. kaoz.. haiz.. one trouble not enough.. i invited two trouble for myself.. someone save me...... feli.... u all wan go? =)
ok la.. i feel very hungry leh.. i lost 1 kg in 2 weeks leh..
aiya.. go sleep liao ba..
oh ya.. when u wan to do something, jus do it.. dun wait till its too late then regret.. thats something ppl always say but seldom do.. i finally understand how it feels like..
its all abt letting go..
nitez..

\\`jUz m3 mYs3lF & i`//
1:04 AM